Voyagers (2021) * 1/2

 

Directed by:  Neil Burger

Starring:  Tye Sheridan, Fionn Whitehead, Lily Rose-Depp, Colin Farrell

If you thought the similar Passengers (2016) was absurd, wait until you see Voyagers.   Both movies deal with a years-long journey to a planet on the other edge of the universe.   The difference?  In Passengers, the ship was populated by people hibernating in pods (two wake up well before the mission ends) while in Voyagers the travelers are wide awake.   The plan is to send a group of thirty young people raised in isolation on the mission in hopes their grandchildren will eventually complete the trek to the faraway planet.   Why raised in isolation?   The hope is they won't know what they're missing when they leave.   Like Passengers, Midnight Sky, or even Interstellar, Earth is Dying and the only way to avoid humankind's perishing is a planet many light years away.

In Passengers, I wondered aloud how the manufacturer of a hibernation pod tested their product to see if someone could sleep in it for 120 years.   In Voyagers, I asked how much food, water, and clothing was necessary to care for potentially three generations worth of people on the same ship.   What if something needs repair?   Is there enough fuel?   The ship should be the size of the gargantuan spacecraft shown in all its glory at the beginning of Spaceballs.   The difference between Voyagers and Spaceballs is that Spaceballs is a comedy, while Voyagers provides unintentional laughs.

The group realizes a blue liquid they consume keeps their primal urges at bay so they don't spend all of their waking hours screwing.   If you're hoping the voyagers' grandchildren can finish the journey, then you have to promote sexual relations.   It's as if they want hanky-panky, but not too much.   Don't even ask how they hope to govern such a thing.   The mission's leader is Richard (Farrell), who acts as a father figure to the young men and women until he meets an inexorable exit midway through the film.  Now the young adults are on their own, and all have a hostile reaction to refraining from drinking the blue water.   Some are a bit more reserved, while others go batshit crazy.   The two personality groups take sides and a Lord of the Flies scenario is born.   

There is fighting and sex, although neither is intense enough to warrant anything worse than a PG-13 rating.  The two leads get it on, but manage to keep on their shirts and underwear.   Farrell, like the blue potion, at least manages to keep things on an even keel before the movie gets rid of him.   No matter what was happening, the questions surrounding the movie's logic soon take over and that's deadly.   

Minari (2020) * * *

 

Directed by:  Lee Isaac Chung

Starring:  Steven Yeun, Noel Kate Cho, Will Patton, Alan S. Kim, Yeri Han, Yuh-Jung Youn

Like the vegetables Jacob (Yeun) painstakingly grows in his field in 1980's Arkansas, Minari takes its time to grow and mature into a portrait of a Korean family trying to make its mark.  Jacob wants nothing more than to be a successful, lucrative farmer.   His wife Monica (Han) resents uprooting their life in California to start over halfway across the country.   Their two bright children, who speak English as a first language, don't like to see their parents fight.   Monica's mother Soonja (Youn) soon moves in and shakes things up with her coarse language, gambling, and directness.   Youn's performance stands out slightly more in a movie filled with very good ones and is likely to win her a Best Supporting Actress Oscar.

Jacob is as intense and focused as Soonja is carefree.   His squabbles with his wife threaten to ruin their marriage.   They can't meet on the same ground.   Another colorful supporting character is Paul (Patton), an evangelical Christian man who works as Jacob's ranch hand and spends his Sundays carrying a cross down a country road.   People like Soonja and Paul breathe life into Minari and lifts it up when it sags.  Minari is autobiographical for writer-director Chung and he has a distinct feel for a time and place which means a lot to him.  

One refreshing aspect of Minari is how its Korean characters do not encounter racism.   Their fellow churchgoers appreciate their presence and make them feel welcome.   The kids are allowed to sleep over their white friends' homes without issue.   I was fully expecting the locals to give the newcomers a hard time, but it did not happen.   Minari is one movie about immigrants which isn't defined by the prejudice they encounter and for that I am grateful.

The night I saw this movie, I then watched Bill Maher's rant about how this year's Oscar-nominated films for Best Picture are downers.   It mentions the ending of Minari, which throws a curve ball into Jacob's plans and forces he and the family to regroup.   I would have preferred a smoother, perhaps more upbeat ending, but sometimes life just isn't like that. 

Godzilla vs. Kong (2021) * 1/2

 

Directed by:  Adam Wingard

Starring:  Alexander Skarsgard, Millie Bobby Brown, Rebecca Hall, Kaylee Hottle, Demian Bichir, Kyle Chandler, Brian Tyree Henry, Eiza Gonzalez

At the end of my review of Godzilla: King of the Monsters (2019), I wished a Kong cameo would have been inserted somewhere in the movie.    Kong takes center stage in Godzilla vs. Kong, a logical, though not necessarily welcome dovetailing of the respective Godzilla and Kong movie series.   The two largest specimens on Earth indeed battle as expected, but it isn't enough to make up for the stupefying boredom we encounter when the monsters aren't fighting.   I got what I asked for all right.   

There are human characters, yes, but they lack any dimension.   An entire subplot about Hollow Earth, an alternate world somewhere beneath the Earth's crust where the likes of Kong and Godzilla once ruled, lacks any sense of wonder.   It just seems like marking time until the gargantuan monsters fight again.   Godzilla vs. Kong, as you would expect, is loud CGI run amok.   By the time the two giants locked horns, I was long past caring.    Then, we have to wait for the inevitable rematch.   In the meantime, I wonder how the property and cities they've damaged will be repaired or how many people were killed when Kong fell into a building .  At least Godzilla and Kong are given more personality than the people.   Since Godzilla and Kong don't occupy the screen 100% of the time, this leads to a lot of phone scrolling. 

There is a plot outside of Godzilla and Kong involving zillionaire corporate head Walter Simmons (Bichir) who invents a robot monster to ostensibly protect humans from the likes of Godzilla and Kong, but we know the robot is designed for more sinister objectives.   In these movies, the filthy reach corporate heads rarely have altruistic motives.  We also meet a young, deaf girl (Hottle), who can communicate with Kong and understand his feelings.   Madison Russell (Brown) returns from the previous Godzilla films to figure out why Godzilla attacked the lab owned by the zillionaire.   The costs for the lab and the robot must run into the trillions, or another larger number which hasn't been invented yet.  And don't get me started on the money which was shelled out to journey to Hollow Earth.   This Walter Simmons must know he is never recouping what he spent on the lab and robot.   He doesn't seem like the type of guy to care either.

The story is similar to Batman v. Superman, in which two heroes fight until a larger threat looms which both will have to unite to take on.   Godzilla and Kong are two giants fighting their own turf war on a planet with eight billion people.   Neither have any evil intent.   They are doing what comes naturally to them.   Back in the day, they would've had more room to stomp around, but now they'd be fortunate to have their own island to themselves.   Jurassic Park and Jurassic World makes the same mistake Godzilla vs. Kong does:  Instead of viewing these creatures with awe and wonder, humans shortsightedly aim to either weaponize them or obliterate them.    Let's face it: there isn't much more that can be done with Godzilla or Kong.   They've had their own individual movies and now they've fought.  I'd rather watch the Godzilla vs. Charles Barkley Nike ad from 1992.  It was over in thirty seconds and it was more entertaining. 

Cold Pursuit (2019) * * *

 

Directed by: Hans Petter Moland

Starring:  Liam Neeson, Emmy Rossum, William Forsythe, Micheal Richardson, Laura Dern, Tom Bateman

I previously posted a review of Cold Pursuit in 2019.   I liked the movie and a comment was posted which was a link to a movie streaming service or some other type of spam.  I removed the comment, but I was still issued a warning by Blogger for trademark infringement or something to that effect.   I removed the post and now I'm reissuing another review.    I give it three stars just like I did two years ago.  

This was one of the better Liam Neeson movies where he kicks ass and takes names after someone wrongs him.   In Cold Pursuit, Neeson is Nels Coxman, a Colorado plow driver whose son is murdered by drug dealers.   Coxman vengefully pursues the dealers and then their boss, a dangerous psycho nicknamed The Viking (Bateman).   The Viking could easily have adorned the cover of GQ magazine many moons ago.  Nels was never a killer or even a violent man, but as the bodies pile up, he develops a thirst for it.  

There are further subplots involving The Viking crossing paths with the local Native American crime lord, someone whom Nels has no beef with.   They find they have more in common than they imagined.  Because Cold Pursuit doesn't simply focus on Neeson, but spreads the wealth around, it is more engaging than standard action fare.    Cold Pursuit also is told with dark humor which takes what would appear to be a standard Liam Neesons action vehicle and turns it into something better.   Now I hope no one sends me any more spam comments.