Friday, July 15, 2022

Thor: Love and Thunder (2022) * 1/2

 



Directed by:  Taika Waititi

Starring:  Chris Hemsworth, Christian Bale, Natalie Portman, Tessa Thompson, Russell Crowe, Taika Waititi, Chris Pratt, Dave Bautista, Kieron Dyer

I lamented in my review of Thor: The Dark World (2013) that Thor was a humorless bore.  Thor: Ragnarok infused the God of Thunder with humor and one-liners and with Thor: Love and Thunder, the transformation is complete:  Thor is now a full-fledged clown.   He spouts one-liners now with the frequency of a Borscht-belt comedian; Henny Youngman with a hammer (or in this case axe, but more on that later.)   I should be careful what I wish for.  

Thor: Love and Thunder begins with promise, however, as Gorr (Bale), a man trying to survive on a desolate, dry planet with his sick daughter in tow.  He prays to the gods to spare his daughter, who eventually dies.   Gorr finds himself later in a forest oasis where he discovers the god he prays to cares not one lick about anyone or anything.   An enraged Gorr kills the god with the help of the Necrosword, which is used to slay gods.   Gorr's new mission in life is to kill the gods, making him an obvious threat to Thor in the near future.

However, Gorr spends so much time off-screen that we cease to care about him, or even recall that he's in the movie.   No, Thor is distracted by the sudden reemergence of his former love Dr. Jane Foster (Portman), who is battling stage 4 cancer, but somehow is able to wield control of Thor's hammer and helps Thor in his battles.   How Jane went from cancer sufferer to The Mighty Thor (as she's called) must've been left on the editing-room floor.   You have to wonder how capable a doctor Jane is when she's informed she has stage 4 cancer and asks, "Out of how many stages?"   Meanwhile, Thor's hammer has thrown Thor over for Jane, so he is relegated to commanding an axe.  

There is a catch.  The more Jane uses the hammer, the more life it sucks from her and her ability to battle cancer.   Then, Gorr kidnaps the children of New Asgard, where the tourists are treated to dinky plays featuring Matt Damon, Luke Hemsworth, Melissa McCarthy, and Sam Neill in uncredited roles as the actors playing Thor, Loki, etc.  This was first utilized in Thor: Ragnarok and it continues not to be funny.   New Asgard is ruled by King Valkyrie (Thompson), who is given little to do here except act as a quasi-mayor.   The Guardians of the Galaxy are also on hand, but they take off after the first thirty minutes never to be seen again.   Those expecting a full-movie Thor/Guardians collaboration will be sorely disappointed. 

This will not be the only thing which disappoints the audience.   Thor: Love and Thunder is chock full of 80's pop-cultural references, Guns N' Roses songs on the soundtrack, cheesy visual effects (by Marvel standards), an incomprehensible plot, and an underwhelming villain all blended into an ungainly film.   Thor: Love and Thunder is too proud of its cleverness and is always trying to be FUNNY.   Russell Crowe is on hand as Zeus, who wields a lightning bolt in the manner Thor (or Jane) uses the hammer.   Crowe has a deep, foreboding voice which would convey Zeus' authority.   Why is he playing Zeus with a Russian accent (or at least sounds Russian, although I read it is supposed to be Greek)?  Maybe Thor: Love and Thunder's goal is to reduce all of its characters to jokes.   If that's the case, it has succeeded brilliantly.  

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