Next Goal Wins (2023) * *

 

Directed by:  Taika Waititi

Starring:  Michael Fassbender, Elisabeth Moss, Will Arnett, Frankie Adams, Oscar Kightley, Chris Alosio, Kaimana, Taika Waititi

Next Goal Wins is an underdog sports movie which doesn't distinguish itself from its betters and or even average ones.  It follows the cliches and the traditions, but lacks energy and passion, two things which Thomas Rongen (Fassbender), the new coach for the hapless American Samoa team, preaches when he bothers to show up or when he's sober.   The beginning of the movie shows American Samoa losing 31-0 to Australia in the 2001 World Cup.  Ten years later, Rongen was fired from his coaching position with the American squad and takes the American Samoa job at the behest of his ex-wife (Moss).  He has a well-deserved reputation as a hothead who could be considered soccer's Bobby Knight. 

Thomas finds the American Samoa players to be passionate, but lacking discipline and organization.  Many of the players hold down second jobs, including the federation president (Kightley) who runs a local restaurant with many players staffed there.  Thomas finds an ally in transgender player Jiayah (Kaimana), who assists him in trying to raise the team's skill level and spirits.  He only has four weeks until World Cup qualifying play against Tonga, a cocky bunch whose job is to play villain and be the superior squad American Samoa must overcome.   Thomas also recruits the 2001 goalkeeper who let in 31 goals and is looking for redemption.

Does Thomas at first dismiss the team as losers?  Does he find solace at the bottom of the bottle?  Does he Have A Past?  Does he whip them into shape?  Is there a training montage?  Does the team find themselves losing at halftime of the Big Game?  Do they come back?  If your answer to any of these questions is anything other than yes, then Next Goal Wins will seem like a fresh movie to you or you have never seen a sports movie before.  

There is nothing wrong with sports movies.  The best ones, even with conventions, can still be stirring or delightfully entertaining.  Next Goal Wins is content to be mediocre and likely will be forgotten not long after I've finished this review.