Anger Management (2003) * *

Directed by:  Peter Segal

Starring:  Adam Sandler, Jack Nicholson, Marisa Tomei, Kurt Fuller, Allen Covert, Luis Guzman, John Turturro, Kari Wuhrer, Heather Graham, Woody Harrelson

Adam Sandler has it in him to make decent comedies.    I know because I've seen some.   Anger Management represents a missed golden opportunity.    He has a legendary co-star in Jack Nicholson who is wasted here.    Nicholson feels more like an Adam Sandler movie guest star.    The idea of pairing meek Sandler with an aggressive Nicholson must've seemed like a hit on paper, but the idea works better in theory than practice. 

We first meet mild-mannered milquetoast Dave Buznik (Sandler) and he is clearly a mess who manages to somehow hold it together without exploding his rage onto the rest of the unsuspecting world.    He has a loving girlfriend, Linda (Tomei), who he is afraid to kiss in public, a loudmouth boss who walks all over him, and a job creating a clothing line for overweight cats which others take the credit for.    Throw in a lecherous male friend of Linda's who clearly has designs on her and you have the recipe for a guy ready to boil over, only he doesn't seem to know it.  

One day on a flight, Dave is caught in the middle of a fight and is unjustly sentenced to anger management counseling led by unconventional therapist Buddy Rydell (Nicholson), who has some unusual methods in anger management therapy including moving in with Dave and sleeping naked next to him in his bed.    Dave is clearly uncomfortable, but can't bring himself to do more than mildly protest Buddy's clear overstepping.    All of this leads to a surprise ending in which a lot is left to chance to produce the desired outcome for all involved.    Most of the fun evolves from Nicholson trying to make something out of this.   We are into it for a while because he's Jack Nicholson, but soon even he is sucked into the morass of ridiculousness and, of course, cameos by Rudy Guiliani and a few New York Yankees.

If Anger Management satirized anger management therapy and created a more enjoyable dynamic between Sandler and Nicholson, this movie would've been special.    Instead, Anger Management devolves into silly pranks, painful miscommunication, and even a fistfight with a monk which I won't even bother to describe since it is such an unsatisfactory payoff for an amusing setup.    The entire movie feels just like that.  

Love at First Bite (1979) * * *

Directed by:  Stan Dragoti

Starring:  George Hamilton, Susan Saint James, Richard Benjamin, Dick Shawn, Arte Johnson, Sherman Hemsley

Count Dracula may be the most sane person in Love at First Bite.   He sucks blood and can turn into a bat sure, but he is also head over heels in love with a New York fashion model named Cindy (Saint James) in a touching, almost adolescent way.   After being forced out of his Transylvania castle by a Romanian government that wants to convert his castle to a gymnastics training center, he and his insect-eating assistant Renfield (Johnson) travel to New York to seek out Cindy.    "Without me, this place will be as exciting as Bucharest on a Monday night," he says as he departs his castle forever.    Burn!

George Hamilton plays Dracula with panache and class; and mostly as the straight man.   He is true to himself as he navigates a world even he thinks is odd...late 1970's New York City.    Winning Cindy's hand (and neck) won't be easy.    He has to dodge her psychiatrist/sometime boyfriend Dr. Jeffrey Rosenberg (Benjamin), who has lineage to the famed vampire hunter Van Helsing and is convinced that Cindy's new suitor is indeed a vampire.    Cindy doesn't believe it, and apparently she has never seen a Count Dracula movie before.    Count Dracula used to scare people, but by the late 1970's, society has seen enough to be frightened of a caped guy with fangs.   New Yorkers just think he's wearing a costume and don't even do a double take when he talks about eternal life and sucking blood.

The biggest laughs belong to Benjamin, who is so gung ho to get rid of the count that he wears garlic necklaces and shoots Drac with three silver bullets in a crowded restaurant.     Dracula politely tells Jeffrey, "My dear Dr. Rosenberg, that is for a werewolf,"    Jeffrey is stunned, and is soon carted off to the funny farm still obsessed with bringing down the vampire.    Between the Count and Jeffrey, Cindy's choice seems rather easy:  Find another guy. 

Love at First Bite doesn't make the mistake of assuming that seeing Count Dracula dance with Cindy on a disco floor is inherently funny.    It earns its laughs through some inspired comedy that doesn't reek of desperation, plus a few gags which wouldn't play well today.    If you're a vampire and you need a supply of blood to survive while wooing Cindy, what is the first thing you do?    Knock over a blood bank, of course.    Love at First Bite manages to adhere to the traditions of a Dracula movie while successfully kidding them at the same time.    It is a delicate balancing act, but it works and it's pretty damn funny.

Hunter Killer (2018) * *

Directed by:  Donovan Marsh

Starring:  Gerard Butler, Gary Oldman, Common, Linda Cardellini, Michael Nyqvist, Toby Stephens, Carter McIntyre, Michael Gor

Hunter Killer is a by-the-numbers thriller with few thrills and no surprises.    It isn't poorly made from a technical standpoint, but it languishes on the screen despite futile attempts to amp up the wattage through submarine battles, gunfights, and the customary, cliched score which accompanies these movies.   You know the one...with the drum rattles and "Rum de dum dum" melody.   And let's not forget the digital title readouts which crawl across the bottom of the screen noting where the action is taking place (example:  Barent Sea-Russia or The Pentagon).   I think we all know it's the Pentagon when we see the aerial view of the Pentagon.

The movie takes place in a bizarro world political landscape in which the Russians aren't ruled by a ruthless dictator like Vladimir Putin, but a sensible president who is kidnapped by his crooked minister of defense (Gor), who can barely conceal his evil intentions when he speaks.    The minister's plan is to stage a coup and remove the Russian president so he can start a war with the United States.    Not a brilliant strategy there, minister.    His government won't last very long with objectives such as that.   And the U.S. President is nothing like our current one.   The President is a level-headed woman, which is more like wishful thinking from the filmmakers and this reviewer.

As Hunter Killer opens, an American sub is sunk by a Russian sub after the Russian sub mistakenly believes the Americans fired on it.    We learn later this was not the case, and as the commander of the sub sent to investigate the matter determines.    The commander is Joe Glass (Butler), a career submarine man who didn't go to Annapolis, which his superiors believe will make him a perfect fit for the mission.    Why this is isn't explained, but I suppose it establishes Glass as a captain with a common touch who depends on hunches.    He does things his way and unconventionally, including rescuing the captain of the sunken submarine (Nyqvist) and using him to help navigate the treacherous waters of a strategically important fjord, much to the astonishment of his crew.    Glass is constantly at odds with his XO (McIntyre), who warns him of impending doom, court martials, etc. if Glass is to stay this course.

Hunter Killer wants to echo more successful submarine movies such as The Hunt for Red October and Crimson Tide, but the only it has in common with them is that it has submarines in it.    The Hunt for Red October and Crimson Tide were more intriguing due to the personalities of the captains involved.    There was a mystery to their actions which we needed to work to figure out.   Those films didn't rely on action as much as Hunter Killer, and thus were much more effective.   Joe Glass will not be mistaken for Sean Connery's Captain Marko Ramius, just as Gerard Butler will never be mistaken for Sean Connery.    Both are Scottish, and that is where the similarities end.

Butler can be effective in the right role, such as in Den of Thieves (2018) or even as an offbeat Phantom of the Opera, but he, like the rest of Hunter Killer, doesn't register much.    The movie feels like it is going through the motions and not much excitement is generated.    Gary Oldman, fresh off his Oscar win for last year's Darkest Hour, is given second billing but has maybe eight minutes of screen time as the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs.    He will not be making a return trip to the podium this year, but does have an Oldman moment in which he rants hysterically at one of his subordinates after a foul-up.    Darkest Hour appears to be an anomaly for him as far as his recent movie role choices are concerned.

Hunter Killer isn't just submarines duking it out, but we also have a Navy SEALs team attempting to infiltrate the compound holding the deposed Russian president hostage and rescue him.    They will then rendezvous with Glass' sub to get home.    All of this will be done in the name of preventing World War III, but the aforementioned Crimson Tide and Hunt for Red October also covered this ground.    There is little about Hunter Killer that is original or fresh, and it will likely be forgotten by moviegoers rather quickly.  

Bad Times at the El Royale (2018) * *

Directed by:  Drew Goddard

Starring:  Jeff Bridges, Cynthia Erivo, Chris Hemsworth, Dakota Johnson, Lewis Pullman, Jon Hamm, Cailee Spaeny

Bad Times at the El Royale is an uneven exercise in style and viewer frustration.    There are stretches in which it threatens to work, but then is dragged down again.    The movie runs two hours, twenty minutes and it easily could've been ninety minutes if not for:  Three Cynthia Erivo-sung cover songs which the film stops dead in its tracks to hear, unnecessary rewinds of scenes so we can see them from other points of view, and a series of long, drawn out speeches.    It is not a good practice to introduce character backstories two hours into the running time either. 

The El Royale is a shady, mostly vacant hotel which sits on the California/Nevada border.    This fact doesn't enhance the story any, except to see characters walking on the painted-on state line like a gymnast gingerly stepping on parallel bars.   We first see the setup, and it is at least intriguing for a while:   A man enters the room and proceeds to bury a bagful of cash underneath the floorboard.   He is soon shot dead and we fast forward ten years to the early 1970's.    The empty hotel is now descended upon by guests who Are Not What They Seem To Be.   There's a forgetful priest (Bridges), a down-on-her luck singer (Erivo), a curt, profane young woman (Johnson) who we later see has kidnapped her kid sister (Spaeny), and a seemingly friendly Southern salesman (Hamm) who hides secrets of his own.    The only staff member on duty (and that is using the term loosely) is Miles (Pullman), who looks very uncomfortable while introducing the guests to the hotel's amenities. 

So far, Bad Times at the El Royale at least keeps me involved, until we learn about the hotel's logistics and what nefarious things may have gone on there previously.    We hear Erivo's rendition of "This Old Heart of Mine" while one of the characters snoops around spying on the other guests.    Then comes the now trite filmmaker style of stopping a scene at a crucial point to jump to another story, knowing full well the movie will circle around to the scene to fill in the blanks.    It is here where I started to want to jump off the train.    Playing with chronology was fresh back around the time of Pulp Fiction, but now it is old hat.    It is a lame attempt to inject style when it isn't needed.  I would've preferred a straight-ahead chronology and for the plot's surprises to unfold naturally.

I won't reveal what the plot has in store and I neglected to mention Hemsworth's Billy Lee, who preens around with his shirt unbuttoned like an early 70's rock god like Robert Plant or Jim Morrison.    He is a sinister cult leader who descends upon the hotel due to his connection to two of the guests.    This sets up a tense, violent showdown which at first works, but like the rest of the movie drags on too long and all effect is lost.    I liked the performances without really caring about the characters the actors portrayed.    Once all of the chips are on the table and all of the secrets are unearthed, I was not much stirred.    I instead felt that I sat through a movie which could've told the same story much more efficiently if it wanted to.    Although, truth be told, I don't know if that would've made the story any easier to watch.   It just would've gotten me out of the theater quicker. 

Halloween (2018) * 1/2

Directed by:  David Gordon Green

Starring:  Jamie Lee Curtis, Judy Greer, Will Patton, Andi Matichak, Nick Castle

This sequel (as it's purported to be) wants us to forget about Halloween II through infinity and reimagine its new narrative, which is that Michael Myers was recaptured on Halloween night 1978 after killing five people and falling off a balcony after being shot multiple times.    Fair enough.    I went in to this Halloween with eyes wide open.    Maybe this Halloween, as reimagined by writers Danny McBride and David Gordon Green, will spring a few surprises on us.   Maybe it will recapture the chilling suspense and magic of John Carpenter's original vision.    It didn't take me long to realize, with a sinking feeling in my heart, that this Halloween is no different than the sequels it wants us to purge from our memories.  

Halloween begins with promise.   A pair of British documentarians/podcasters are doing a story on the events of the first movie.   They gain access to Myers, who still has not uttered a word since his institutionalization for the murder of his sister in 1963.   We also still don't see his face, and the movie maddeningly contrives situations which obscure it, such as soft-focus shots or Myers standing behind a tree.    Is he Michael Myers or Wilson from Home Improvement?    We know this much about him:  He eats, drinks, breathes, ages, grows a beard, and excretes waste, but he just can't die.   No matter how much he is shot, bleeds, or is blown up, he just won't shuffle off this mortal coil.    And neither can countless psychopathic killers in other slasher movies born out of the success of the initial 1978 film.  

What makes Carpenter's first film so successful, and its imitators and sequels so unsuccessful, was its fearful mood, jarring suspense, and eerie atmosphere.    It functioned on the level of a nightmare, like the ones in which we try in vain to outrace something chasing us and feel as if we are running in quicksand.    This version of Halloween doesn't focus on the suspense, but the killings themselves.    It is more intrigued by showing all of the creative ways Myers can bash someone's skull in, stab a woman through the neck, or otherwise separate a person's limbs and blood from his/her body.

We also meet Laurie Strode (Curtis), who since surviving Myers' killing spree from forty years ago is now a prisoner of her own fear.    She lives in a compound with trap doors and an arsenal of weapons stored for the impending return of Michael Myers.   That or if David Koresh should resurrect.    Laurie's obsession with Michael Myers was so intense, she finds herself estranged from her daughter Karen (Greer) and granddaughter Allyson (Matichak).   But, at the very least, Karen can handle herself with a shotgun.    Laurie's scenes of estrangement and isolation are effective, but like everything else in Halloween, it is eschewed once Michael escapes from the institution and starts hacking people to death.

Halloween soon becomes a geek show.   Characters are introduced just to be offed by Michael and his knife.    He is soon reunited with his famous mask and is able to slink around town in the dark undetected while there should be an massive manhunt for an escaped, evil serial killer.   There may be two or three cop cars on the case, but no sense of panic in the streets, even in the age of social media.    No amber alerts or breaking news stories.    The entire incident seems to take place in a vacuum away from the outside world.

The movie lumbers towards a final showdown between Laurie, her family, and the indestructible Michael Myers, but not before a dozen or so victims have met their gruesome fates.    It is all so dull. There is no suspense or good, old-fashioned frights.   We are simply witnesses to one butchering after another.    The conclusion is as predictable as it is inevitable.    When the final battle reaches its conclusion, two questions lingered:   Didn't Laurie see Halloween II?   And doesn't she know that it isn't going to work?   It is funny how all of the ideas this movie borrows are from all of the sequels it wants you to pretend you didn't see.

Like James Bond, there is nothing more that can be done with the Halloween series.    Characters have been killed and resurrected, recast, and entire events are wiped away and said never to have happened, but what's left is what you've already seen before and wish you hadn't.

Colette (2018) * *

 Directed by: Wash Westmoreland

Starring:  Keira Knightley, Dominic West, Denise Gough, Fiona Shaw

I have trouble putting my finger on why Colette didn't work.   The actors do fine, passionate work and the filmmakers clearly love the subject matter, but it doesn't realize its early potential.   It looks great, but feels empty despite filling the screen with lush scenery, lots of sex, and French characters speaking in British accents.    At least the actors didn't run around sounding like Inspector Clouseau. 
But, there is more to why Colette ultimately fails.   It is about a woman finding her voice in a male-dominated literary world (and just about every other world) in turn of the 20th century France, but it isn't emotionally stirring.    All of Colette's triumphs occur in the epilogue before the closing credits, when we see pictures of the real people the actors portrayed over the last two hours and a paragraph posted about what happened to them .    We get the sense the movie ended just as it was getting revved up.   The actors, especially Knightley and West, truly have a blast with their roles.  Their characters have wit and intelligence.   They adore stretching their mouths to let the big words come right out...as Peter Gabriel once sang.

We first meet Colette (Knightley) in the French countryside of the late 1890's.   Her full name is much bigger, so we will call her Colette for our own sanity.   She has a wild spirit, which can't be let loose in her strict household.    She has secret rendezvous in a nearby barn with family friend Willy (West), a critic and writer of some note who lives in exciting Paris.    They marry, but Colette soon learns her husband is a philanderer, lives well beyond his means, and pays (or doesn't pay) ghostwriters for just about every piece of literature that bears his name.

Fed up with Willy's antics, which he attributes to "doing what men do", as if that were a legitimate excuse, Colette leaves for a while, but Willy wins her back.    Soon after Willy, who is in such desperate financial straits he has his furniture repossessed, has Colette ghostwrite a novel which he will take credit for that turns out to be a massive success.    Willy is the toast of the town, while Colette slaves away writing sequels, which Willy cajoles out of her by locking her in a room for hours at a time.    We know the marriage is doomed, especially when both Colette and Willy have an affair with the same woman and Colette takes a steady interest in a transgender actor.    Colette soon learns to sing and dance and takes to performing her works on the stage, while Willy drifts into obscurity.    Colette eventually demands to be given proper credit for her work and slowly frees herself from Willy's grasp.    This all sounds much more captivating than it actually is. 

Colette's first thirty minutes or so contain the most life.   Willy and Colette establish themselves as interesting people and we care about them.    We just wish the rest of the movie could keep up with them.   The middle sags to the point it doesn't recover.    We never learn to root for Colette or despise Willy.   The movie simply assumes we will do so.   We simply pity them both for being hung out to dry in rambling, unfocused movie.   When Colette finally wins the rights to her work and she can finally take credit for them, the lights go up and there isn't much to cheer about.   Pity.

The Old Man and the Gun (2018) * * *

Directed by:  David Lowery

Starring:  Robert Redford, Sissy Spacek, Danny Glover, Casey Affleck, Tom Waits, Gene Jones, Tika Sumpter

Robert Redford remains charismatic and charming.  His performance in The Old Man and the Gun carries the film, which is lightweight material buoyed by Redford's presence as an elderly gentleman who, other than being a serial bank robber, is a sweet guy.   I don't intend that as snark or sarcasm.    Redford's Forrest Tucker is a genial man, even while he's holding up a bank teller.    Bank employees can't help but marvel at his niceness when being interviewed by police.    I suppose if you're going to held up, Forrest would be the best option to be your robber. 

We first meet Forrest as he enters a bank wearing a fake moustache and pleasantly informing the bank manager of his intentions.    He gets away scot-free, and meets a pleasant woman named Jewel (Spacek) along the way.   It is clear Forrest is very good at bank robbing and enjoys it.    He doesn't need the money, and his partners Teddy (Glover) and Waller (Waits) stay in the game to give themselves purpose in their old age.    Forrest spent most of his life behind bars, and has escaped fifteen of the eighteen times he was incarcerated.    We see each and every escape via a montage which includes footage from Redford's earlier film roles.

Could Jewel be the one who finally gets Forrest to settle down?   He was married once, and we find he has a daughter and grandson he never knew about.    The movie wisely doesn't use this information in a trite subplot.    Instead, it further illustrates Forrest's single-minded passion in life does not include a family.    When Jewel asks him if he has kids, Forrest replies, "I sure hope not".
Forrest likes Jewel enough and maybe there are moments when he thinks a life with her may be what's best for him, but does she put a smile on his face the way armed robbery does?  

We also meet Detective John Hunt (Affleck), a Texas detective bored with his job and disliking the long hours away from his family.    But, once word of Forrest's robberies surface, the chase invigorates him much in the same way robbery does for Forrest.    Hunt deduces Forrest's serial robberies go back a few years and respects his quarry for his abilities.    Thankfully, The Old Man and the Gun doesn't devolve into a cat and mouse showdown with a violent end.    The men develop a mutual respect, and their one scene together takes place in a diner, although don't expect the same intensity as the DeNiro/Pacino diner scene from Heat.    This isn't that kind of movie.

The Old Man and the Gun runs a mostly taut 95 minutes and while it leans heavily on Redford, the supporting cast has some nice moments also, especially Waits delivering an offbeat rhythm to his role which makes us wish he spoke more often.     I also enjoyed the aesthetics of the opening credits and the grainy film stock, which allows to be believe that we are not only seeing events which took place in 1981, but a film which could've been made then also.    Redford originally stated this would be his last film role.    He later backtracked a bit on this statement, which is heartening.    If The Old Man and the Gun proves nothing else, it proves Redford still has it as a leading man at 82. 

First Man (2018) * *

Directed by:  Damien Chazelle

Starring:  Ryan Gosling, Claire Foy, Shea Whigham, Patrick Fugit, Corey Stoll, Kyle Chandler, Jason Clarke

As much as Damien Chazelle's previous two efforts, Whiplash (2014) and La La Land (2016) extolled truths about human nature, First Man curiously lacks humanity.   The movie nails the technical aspects while shortchanging the people.    The scenes in space, on the moon, and in the tiny, claustrophobia-inducing space shuttles make us feel like we are authentically there, but what we don't feel is anything for its subject.    First Man keeps us outside of Neil Armstrong and without a human reason compelling us to care, First Man is a flat exercise in spectacular visuals. 

Ryan Gosling (also in Chazelle's La La Land) plays Armstrong as a cold, emotionally-repressed pilot who jumps headlong into NASA's moon mission to forget about the death of his two-year-old daughter from a brain tumor.    The early scenes with the daughter and Armstrong's response to her death are powerful, but after those, there is no more where that came from.   Like Armstrong himself, the movie mutes its emotions and concentrates on the trial and error which eventually led to the successful Apollo 11 launch in July 1969.    I normally find scenes in which experts ply their trade fascinating, but in First Man the genesis of the space program isn't stirring as much as confusing.    I think I know what the Gemini missions were supposed to accomplish, but I am not sure I could pass a test on them.    It also took me a while to get the other astronauts straight. 

Armstrong's strong wife Janet (Foy) has dealt with the death of her daughter in a more healthy manner, and she has one or two very good scenes in which she lays down the law to Armstrong and his bosses, especially when NASA shuts off the broadcast which allows her to listen in on her husband's mission from home.    Don't get me wrong.   I don't need an actor to explain his emotions in lots of dialogue.   A nonverbal cue can be every bit as powerful as a half-page of speech, but Gosling is lifeless.    It's as if he was directed to expend as little emotional energy as possible. 

We feel the rattling of the spacecraft after it launches and speeds towards space.    Once in space and eventually on the lunar surface, we sense how quiet and desolate those places are...and how scary it would be to be stranded there.    First Man gets that right in spades, but the mission may as well have been piloted by robots for all of the emotion we are allowed to invest in Armstrong and Aldrin.    The actors are more than capable in doing what is asked of them, but this is clearly a conscious choice by Chazelle to focus less on the people and more on the visual and sound effects, both of which could garner numerous technical awards at this year's Oscars.

There was a small amount of controversy, mostly stirred up by conservative pundits who noted the actual planting of the American flag was left out of the movie.    Well, not to worry flag enthusiasts and fetish patriots, the American flag is shown in abundance in First Man, as emblems on the astronaut's uniforms or even in wide angle shots of the flag on the moon.    There just isn't a scene visualizing Armstrong and Aldrin planting the flag there.    Trust me, the lack of a flag planting scene is the least of my worries about First Man, which is disappointing for many other more important reasons than the placing of the flag on the moon. 

View from the Top (2003) * * *

Directed by:  Bruno Barreto

Starring:  Gwyneth Paltrow, Mark Ruffalo, Mike Myers, Kelly Preston, Christina Applegate, Candice Bergen, Rob Lowe

We meet Donna (Paltrow), a nice young woman who sees a job as a flight attendant as a chance to see the world and move up the corporate ladder.    Little does she realize seeing the world means spending lonely Christmases in a Paris hotel room and there isn't a lot of upward mobility with her career choice.    She despairs when she is assigned flights to and from Cleveland, but when you mostly see the inside of a hotel room and then another airport no matter where you go, all of the cities may as well be Cleveland.

View from the Top is a charming comedy with mostly sweet characters (and a couple of backstabbers mixed in for good measure) and an important moral given by Donna's idol Sally (Bergen), who wrote a book about her experiences as a flight attendant.    You can work your way to the top, but unless you have someone to share the experience with, it is meaningless.    Donna has an on-again, off-again romantic relationship with Ted (Ruffalo), a law student who falls hard for Donna. She falls for him, to a point.  Her livelihood doesn't allow for much time together.  

Donna is a likable woman who thinks she knows what she wants until she obtains it.   She works hard and trains to be a competent flight attendant with the help of trainer John Whitney (Myers), whose one cross eye disqualifies him from being an attendant.    His bitterness occasionally oozes out from behind his pleasant, supportive façade.  Myers has goofy fun with this rare non-Shrek, non-Austin Powers supporting role.

View from the Top is a sweet romantic comedy that gets the job done.  We know how it will end and why, but we still don't mind taking the journey.  Paltrow hits the right notes and the movie does also.    Sometimes, that's enough.

The Mummy (2017) * 1/2

Directed by:  Alex Kurtzman

Starring:  Tom Cruise, Sofia Boutella, Annabelle Wallis, Russell Crowe, Courtney B. Vance, Jake Johnson

Tom Cruise plays Nick Morton in The Mummy and he is virtually indistinguishable from Ethan Hunt or Jack Reacher.    These are men of action and some charm who find themselves hanging from high places or aircraft, but not much else.    Cruise can do these roles in his sleep, and to his credit, he invests considerable energy into them instead of phoning them in.    But, The Mummy may be his most forgettable movie to date.    It's a lifeless retelling of The Mummy story, with Sofia Boutella as the undead creature from ancient Egypt thrust into the modern world with the intent to destroy it.    Cue the chases.   Cue the CGI.   Cue the boredom.

Nick is a rogue military guy who goes AWOL with his loyal sidekick (Johnson) to find treasure.   Little did he know he would unleash the mummy and a plague on the world...with a possibility that Nick himself will become the mummy's cohort after she infects him with whatever made her the mummy in the first place.    It's a funny thing about that infection.   Other people who come in contact with the creature, like Nick's cohort, and they are immediately turned into the undead, while Nick teeters on the edge of becoming one, but somehow doesn't.    Why this occurs is not adequately explained, or maybe they explained it and I zoned out.   It wouldn't be the first time in this movie.

Soon, Dr. Henry Jekyll (Crowe) is brought in to explain to Nick what is happening and about the existence of a secret anti-mummy contingent whose objective is to stop dreaded powers from taking over the Earth.    Yes, this is the same Jekyll as in Jekyll and Hyde, which was to be part of the proposed Dark Universe which was ultimately shelved once The Mummy tanked at the box office.    A little sly humor, such as Nick pointing out that he has the same name as Robert Louis Stevenson's famed character, would not have been unwelcome.

The Mummy leaves room open for a sequel, but thankfully one is not in the works.    There isn't much that can be done to bring this stuff to life.    Yes, there is action and it is just that.   Action.  With no real reason for us to care about its outcome, and without that, what's the point?

Venom (2018) * 1/2

Directed by:  Ruben Fleischer

Starring:  Tom Hardy, Michelle Williams, Riz Ahmed, Jenny Slate, Reid Scott

An oozy, black substance is brought to Earth by an egomaniacal billionaire just to invade bodies and become one-half of a slapstick comedy duo with Tom Hardy.    That's the simple explanation of Venom, which is on the fringes of the Marvel Universe and argues in favor of my belief that not every Marvel character needs to have a movie made of it.    When Venom emerges (as you see in the picture above), he is an ugly, ungainly monster which looks like the offspring of a piranha and an oil spill.

Venom, as the substance likes to call itself when it attaches itself to the perfect host in disgraced investigative reporter Eddie Brock (Hardy), at first hopes to destroy Earth, but after spending some time in Eddie's skin, he decides instead to save it.    It seems Venom's character shape shifts emotionally as well as physically.    When Venom opens, Eddie's life is going pretty good.    He is a rising star as a hotshot TV journalist with an attorney girlfriend named Anne (Williams) who just so happens to represent the empire run by Carlton Drake (Ahmed) which Eddie is investigating.    Drake is up to some malfeasance, by God, and Eddie is going to prove it.    But, Eddie screws up and it costs him his job and his girl.    Fast forward to six months later, and we see Eddie living in a shoddy apartment with a neighbor who wails on his electric guitar in the middle of the night.

Drake is the billionaire who brings back Venom from space and uses homeless people as unwitting lab rats to test its body snatching powers.     Through plot developments too laborious to recap, Eddie finds himself in the lab gathering evidence of Drake's nefarious scheme when he is infected with the parasitic Venom.    Venom wreaks havoc on Eddie's insides, causing an insatiable lust for live food and frozen tater tots.    He winds up taking a bath in a lobster tank in a fancy restaurant and otherwise engaging in an inner battle against Venom.    I was reminded of Dr. Sherman Klump trying to fend off Buddy Love from taking over his body in The Nutty Professor, and Eddie starts walking with the grace of Vincent D'Onofrio's bug man in Men in Black.    I was also wishing I was watching either of those films instead of Venom.

Hardy puts on a distracting Noo Yawk accent which sounds like Adam Sandler as Billy Madison imitating Ratso Rizzo.    We know Hardy can handle numerous accents, so why not just give us one which doesn't detract from the character?    Or just make him British like Hardy himself?   When Eddie speaks, I find it difficult to believe he is even literate, let alone that he is a smart, crusading reporter.    Almost any accent choice is better than the one which winds up in the movie.

Hardy is up to the physical challenge of playing a man trying in vain to prevent Venom from overtaking him.    This leads to some slapstick which Steve Martin performed better in All of Me.   Watching Eddie is tiring.   I wanted him to get some rest and a shave.    He seems like a decent enough guy who doesn't deserve a movie like Venom to happen to him.  

A Star Is Born (2018) * * *

Directed by:  Bradley Cooper

Starring:  Bradley Cooper, Lady Gaga, Sam Elliott, Andrew Dice Clay, Dave Chappelle, Rafi Gavron

The first half of A Star Is Born was my worst fears realized about the film:   It was about showing us the musical skills of Bradley Cooper and, of course, Lady Gaga.    The dramatic scenes felt like they were killing time until the next musical number.    In the second half, the movie finds its footing and its focus, becoming an immensely powerful and resonant look at the hell of addiction.     The musical performances were needed to establish Lady Gaga's Ally (just Ally, no last name) as a legit talent whose rising star soon eclipses the fading glory of her mentor turned husband, country singer Jackson Maine (Cooper).    

This is the fourth telling of A Star Is Born and Cooper, as a first-time director, wisely avoids what made its most recent 1976 predecessor such a disappointment:   It doesn't turn into a mere showcase for Gaga to belt out a few new songs and sell a soundtrack.    It settles on the more compelling story of Maine's descent into a hellish existence.    As the film opens, Maine is about to go on stage while popping pills and washing them down with alcohol.    He is losing his hearing, but still packs them in on tour.    After the show, he runs out of alcohol, and stops into a drag bar to refuel when he sees Ally performing.    She is, of course, not a drag performer, and Jackson is enthralled by the waitress/part-time singer/songwriter.  

Faster than you can say "A Star Is Born", Ally is soon accompanying Jackson on tour and performing one of her own songs, the very good "Shallow", and thus overcoming her lack of confidence in performing her own stuff.    Many performers would love to continue performing to worshipful sell-out crowds, but Jackson carries so much baggage he can't see he is still in a pretty good place.     His alcoholism and drug use alarms his older brother/caretaker Bobby (Elliott) to the point that Bobby says enough is enough and quits the tour.    Some of the best scenes in the movie carry extra emotional weight thanks to a smart, knowing, and sympathetic Elliott performance, who has walked miles for Jackson but finds he can walk no further.

Besides Cooper and Gaga, A Star Is Born has touching supporting performances by comedians Andrew Dice Clay as Ally's limo driver father and Dave Chappelle as Noodles, a longtime friend of Jackson's who advises him to settle down; advice which Jackson doesn't heed.    As well as Gaga sings (naturally) and acts, the movie ultimately belongs to Cooper, who does the heaviest dramtic lifting.   A Star Is Born thankfully avoids the clichés of rising stardom, which means Ally would have to turn into an aloof jerk who is completely oblivious to her husband's suffering.    Lady Gaga's Ally is grounded, hard working, and self-contained.    She is the steadying, calming hand for Jackson, who loves her but loves his drinking more.

Cooper's version of A Star Is Born gets right what its 1976 predecessor starring Barbra Streisand and Kris Kristofferson got wrong.    In the 1976 film version, Kristofferson turns to heavy drug use in response to his envy over his wife's burgeoning stardom, but let's face it, the movie was made to showcase Streisand and it overshadowed everything else.    It was her vanity project.    Cooper remade the story because he add something more to say.    Jackson is already a mess when he stumbled onto Ally.    In a strange way, Ally's stardom gives him at least some hope for a way out of his downward spiral.    But, sadly, tragically, and somewhat inevitably, hope dissipates at the bottom of a glass. 

Night School (2018) * *

Directed by:  Malcolm D. Lee

Starring:  Kevin Hart, Tiffany Haddish, Rob Riggle, Fat Joe, Mary Lynn Rajskub, Anne Winters, Keith David, Taran Killam, Al Madrigal, Romany Malco, Ben Schwartz

Night School is an amiable comedy with a few laughs, some desperate gross-out humor, and then is soon over; likely not to stay in our minds for too long after viewing.    It's not terrible, but mostly forgettable.    There aren't any surprises, except for one character's amazing ability to heal after falling from a rooftop and seemingly dislocating his shoulder in a nasty way. 

We first meet Teddy (Hart) in high school spectacularly flubbing the SAT exam.    Words, equations, and problems don't simply fly off the page in Teddy's mind, they assault him.    He drops out of high school, but manages to land a nice girlfriend and a secure job as a barbeque grill salesperson.    Sure he can't afford his flashy sports car or the engagement ring, but otherwise life is pretty good, until one day it isn't.    The barbeque grill store burns to the ground thanks to Teddy's idiocy, and he finds he needs to get his GED in order to work at this best friend's firm as a financial analyst.

Teddy enrolls in night school at his former high school, where the nerd he picked on then is now the principal who uses Joe Clark (from Lean on Me) as inspiration.    Perhaps too much.    The night school teacher, Carrie Carter (Haddish), does her best with her class of misfits who in the 1970's would be at home on Welcome Back Kotter.    Besides Teddy, the class consists of a mother of three trying to get out from under her husband's thumb (Rajskub), a prisoner who Skypes into the class (Fat Joe), a teenage delinquent (Winters), a paranoid conspiracy theorist (Madrigal), and a former waiter who lost his job thanks to Teddy (Madrigal).    The characters have names, but I can't recall them and I'm too lazy to look them up.

No matter.   Night School tries to spread around the laughs, but this is mostly Hart's film, with Haddish chiming in with some laughs as the weary teacher who nonetheless does her best to reach Teddy and pierce through his defenses caused by a lack of confidence and a variety of learning disabilities.    Teddy may have a fiancée he loves, but he and Haddish have some decent chemistry, although any attempt at a romantic relationship is quickly squelched with a revelation out of left field.    Not much effort is made to flesh out Teddy's fiancée.    She is nice, sweet, intelligent, and kind of bland.    You could almost use those adjectives to describe the movie she's in as well.