Pixels (2015) * *

Directed by:  Chris Columbus

Starring:  Adam Sandler, Kevin James, Peter Dinklage, Josh Gad, Michelle Monaghan, Lainie Kazan


There are plenty of comedic possibilities with Pixels' premise.     The trouble is, Pixels starts with the premise and figures it is enough to keep the laughs going, so it becomes more of a routine comic action thriller.      There are skilled actors in it who gamely participate, but we're left with a premise without a good enough movie to surround it.     I have some affection for the nostalgia involved.    It is great to see Pac Man, Donkey Kong, and Q-Bert, even though they are trying to annihilate the planet.  

Pixels begins in 1982.    Best friends Sam and Will go to the newly opened local arcade (remember those?) and Sam discovers his natural knack for beating games like Donkey Kong and Pac Man.     He soon enters the World Championship and battles the cocky Eddie Plant for the title.     The emcee (Dan Aykroyd) announces that the championships are being filmed and sent into space as part of a time capsule for possible alien worlds to discover.    Sam loses to the arrogant Eddie and things are never the same for him after.  

Fast forward to present day.    Sam (Sandler) is now a hapless video technician while Will is President of the United States.     They maintain a close friendship despite the discrepancies in fame and government clearance.     Once you get past the idea of Kevin James being President then you can move on to the rest of the plot.  

It turns out an alien world discovered the time capsule and mistook it for a declaration of war.    They sent gigantic versions of Galaga, Pac Man, Centipede, and Donkey Kong (among others) to invade Earth.     We never see the aliens because they are disguised as either video game characters, Ronald Reagan, or pop music stars of the day.    Will assembles the team of Sam, Eddie (who is now in jail, but as boastful as ever), and Ludlow Lamonsoff (Gad), an old friend of Sam's turned conspiracy theorist.    ("I can prove JFK shot first.").    They will battle the video game aliens with weapons designed by Violet (who turns out to be a member of the Joint Chiefs of Staff).    

The thought of a giant Pac Man or Donkey Kong wreaking havoc on Earth is funnier in theory than in practice.     There are sparse laughs, but Pixels resembles Independence Day more than anything else.     Adam Sandler has starred in some stinkers (Billy Madison, The Waterboy, Just Go With It, etc.) and some pretty good films (The Wedding Singer, You Don't Mess With The Zohan, and 50 First Dates).     They all follow the same tempo involving numerous Sandler wisecracks, characters screaming at each other, and cameos by Sandler's buddies.      Sandler is pushing 50.    We have seen him branch out and challenge himself before.    Isn't it time to leave the lame comedies behind?

I admired Peter Dinklage, who continues to impress as a terrific character actor.    He jumps headlong into Eddie Plant, who offers to help destroy the aliens with the stipulation that he has a threesome with Martha Stewart and Serena Williams in the Lincoln Bedroom.     Pretty inspired, although Serena Williams shows up in a cameo and does her persona no favors.     She acts as if she were appearing under threat of deportation.     Can't she at least pretend to have a good time?    The other actors do at least.

Oh and yes there are anachronisms abound in the film, which pop culture geeks like me recognized immediately.     For instance, Madonna is featured prominently in the time capsule even though she was not famous in 1982 and certainly not appearing on MTV.     Samantha Fox is also mentioned, but I don't recall her coming on to the scene until about five years later.    How did Max Headroom figure into the equation when he didn't show up until 1985?     I could go on, but it would just be showing off at this point.