Memories of Me (1988) * * *

Directed by:  Henry Winkler

Starring:  Billy Crystal, Alan King, Jobeth Williams

It is easier to accept Abe and Abbie Polin as a comedy duo rather than father and son.    They approach each other with one liners ready to go, but what is really going on underneath?     That conflict is at the heart of Henry Winkler's Memories of Me, co-written by star Billy Crystal, which takes a hard look at a "show biz" family.

As Memories of Me opens, New York surgeon Abbie (Crystal) suffers a heart attack and begins to reassess his estrangement from his father.    We learn Abbie's parents split up years ago and Abe (King) moved out West to become an actor.    Abbie hasn't seen his father in five years, but decides to take time off and visit him.     Abe has worked consistently in Hollywood over the years on TV and in movies, but as an extra.    His talent:  "Being a face in the crowd," he tells Abbie, who frequently asks his father, "Don't you feel like a putz?"   Abe does not.    He is the self-proclaimed "King of the Extras" and we soon see Abe is indeed the quasi-leader of a group of professional extras that hang out in a Hollywood bar, waiting impatiently for their next gigs. 

Abbie resents his father for leaving he and his mother years ago.    Abe retorts with, "Who put you through medical school?"   Abbie replies, "Uncle Dave,"    Abe fires back, "Well, he could afford it."   Abe and Abbie's conversations are a lot like that, with Abbie mostly playing the straight man setting up lines for Abe to knock out of the park.    But, sooner or later, the two men must come to terms with their relationship, especially as another medical emergency befalls Abe, who smokes, drinks, and eats tacos for breakfast.   As Abbie puts it, "I came here to get you in or get you out of my life."

Memories of Me depicts a father-son relationship that is friendly, but distant.    Abe and Abbie don't hate each other as much as they don't understand what the other feels.     They were involved in too much distracting banter to reveal the truth of their feelings towards each other.     There is clearly love, but also bitterness.    Abbie's on-again, off-again girlfriend Lisa (Williams), also a doctor, visits LA to cheer up Abbie, but soon finds herself in the middle of the ongoing Cold War between Abe and Abbie.    She intuits how much the two men are actually alike, which Abbie is quick to deny, but soon understands this is probably more true than he cares to admit.

The key to the film's success lies in the performances.    Crystal and King have a relaxed, unforced rapport which serves the film well, even when Abe and Abbie's relationship is anything but relaxed.    Williams is not merely a romantic interest for Abbie, but an outsider who quietly observes the dynamic between the two men and refuses to play referee.    She tells Abbie, "You are great in bed, but then you are barely able to hold my hand."    A few days with he and his father shed light on why that is. 

The ending is more or less what you would expect, but it isn't overly schmaltzy or sentimental.    There are laughs, tears, reconciliation, and one of the great closing lines I've seen in a movie.    Too bad it is on a tombstone.