Jurassic World (2015) * 1/2

Directed by:  Colin Treverrow

Starring:   Chris Pratt, Bryce Dallas Howard, Vincent D'Onofrio, BD Wong, Judy Greer, Nick Robinson, Ty Simpkins

Jurassic World feels like a retread of an idea that exhausted its dramatic possibilities after the initial Jurassic Park.    We see more CGI dinosaurs running amok and thinly characterized humans fleeing from them.    Dinosaurs attack humans.    Humans attack dinosaurs.    Some dinosaurs even attack each other.     It all wears thin very quickly.    Cloning dinosaurs only to hunt them or kill them all over again just seems like a missed opportunity for humankind.     Let's say humans were able to clone dinosaurs and they would be alive again after 65 million years in extinction.     Is it wise or practical to train them like dogs or keep them in captivity in a theme park?    Shouldn't we learn about them?   

The intended audience for Jurassic World is not interested in such questions.    They want to see dinosaurs running free and putting humans in mortal danger.    If that is what you want, then you certainly get it in abundance in Jurassic World.     The people and the plot are immaterial anyway.    There is as little backstory as possible involved.    Why bother with such trivialities?     There are engaging actors who will either kill or be killed.     Does anyone remember any of the characters' names from Jurassic Park (or parts 2 or 3?)    The names here will fade into obscurity as well.   

The world's population in this film has a very short memory.    They ignore the events of the first three films and attend the Jurassic World theme park by the tens of thousands each day in a Costa Rican jungle.    Aren't they a tad afraid of being on safari with raptors?    Wouldn't it be depressing traveling thousands of miles just to see a reborn species trapped in cages like average zoo animals?   
Do we really need to see a Sea World like attraction in which a giant dinosaur emerges from the water to eat sharks?    The costs to fly to Jurassic World and spend one day there would make Disney World seem like a bargain.     And don't even get me started on how long the waiting times must be for each attraction.     How much would it cost to feed just the dinosaur that eats sharks?   Not to mention the other dinosaurs?

The actors here have been appealing before and will be again.    The characters are introduced and then hastily thrown into danger.    Owen Grady (Pratt), who could be Indiana Jones in a better movie, is on hand as a dinosaur trainer thrown headlong into a plot involving a corporation's plan to transform raptors into soldiers that will take the place of humans in wars.    Will they be trained to fire automatic weapons?    Or throw grenades?    Or follow orders?    What would their basic training consist of?    The ringleader of this ridiculous premise is played by Vincent D'Onofrio, who seems convinced that this may fly.    This is an actor who played Pvt. Pyle in Full Metal Jacket and is now trying to convince Owen Grady that dinosaurs would make great soldiers.    I would have liked to sit in on the board meeting that approved this harebrained scheme.  

How does someone even begin the process of becoming a dinosaur trainer?     Pratt's co-star is Bryce Dallas Howard, who is the operations manager of the park and goes by the name Claire.    She is not even given a last name and manages to go through the entire film without losing her heels.     They team up to thwart the dinosaurs and escape safely from their clutches.     I'm sure at one point they will be in a romance, but they barely share even a kiss in this film.     We don't want the kids watching corrupted by actually see two adults kissing.    Yuck!   Not when there are dozens of unimportant people to be terrorized, eaten, and killed by dinosaurs.   

Those who plopped down money for Jurassic World to be entertained by chases and humungous dinosaurs will likely get their money's worth.    I saw the 3D version, but the film really didn't need to be in 3D.    It adds little.   I didn't expect a lazy, tired retread of Jurassic Park.    I think it's sad to see SWAT teams dispatched to track a hybrid dinosaur that really only wants to be left alone.     You mean to tell me dinosaurs waited 65 million years to return to Earth only to be shot at?    They would likely pray for another asteroid to come along.     Those who don't believe in Evolution finally have the proof they need that dinosaurs and people indeed inhabited the Earth at the same time.