Pig (2021) *

Directed by:  Michael Sarnoski

Starring:  Nicolas Cage, Alex Wolff, Adam Arkin, David Knell

The setup is so insane that we figure it has to lead somewhere.   A truffle hunter named Rob who lives in the forest (Cage) one night has his beloved pig kidnapped.   A nonplussed Rob presses his only contact with the outside world, his flashy truffle buyer Amir (Wolff), into service to help him travel to nearby Portland to find his pig.  This is not a comedy and this is not the setup for a punchline.  This is deadly serious moviemaking.   I wasn't expecting a John Wick ripoff in which Rob decimates the souls who made the mistake of taking the pig, but I was expecting something to develop.   Not much does.  There isn't a worthy payoff, or any payoff at all, to repay us for our patience.   Pig leads nowhere.  Well, it leads somewhere, but nowhere we give a hoot about. 

Nicolas Cage's outgoing voicemail message must say: "Whatever you're offering, I'll take it..."  How else can the once respected Oscar-winning actor find himself in projects such as Pig?   Cage can of course act, and he once was able to transcend silly material and make it palatable.   Those days are long gone.  Now he's the guy who is taking this stuff seriously while we're convinced the rest of Hollywood is pranking him, making bets among themselves as to what project or script Cage may actually reject.  

Pig follows Rob and Amir into the dark, seedy underbelly of Portland's restaurant scene.   Apparently, there is a Fight Club-inspired tournament in which cooks, busboys, etc. take out their frustrations on each other by holding bareknuckle contests.   Rob apparently used to be, and is still considered in some parts, a legendary chef who lit out for the forest when his wife passed on.   He now lives as practically a homeless person who hunts for rare truffles with the help of his pig buddy who he loves more than life itself.   He is dirty, beat up, disheveled, and must smell to high heaven.   When he finds himself in Amir's posh apartment or in an upscale restaurant looking like he hasn't showered, shaved, or cut his hair in a looooong time, no one even thinks to drop him a hint like hand him a bar of soap and a razor.  The other patrons in the restaurant don't even give him a second look.    

We find out who took the pig and we figure out why, but by then, such motivations are irrelevant.   Rob is Wounded and In Pain, and Walks With A Purpose, but the only question we have when this dreary enterprise's end credits roll is:  Is That All There Is?   I've read glowing critic reviews for Pig and I can scarcely believe what I'm reading.   They must be joking.   I know movies are subjective and people like or dislike them for their own reasons, but I call bullshit on any of these critics who can honestly say they would watch Pig again over just about any other movie alternative.   Oh, and the pig is easily the most likable character in the movie.